The Lamb of God!

I have loved the whole experience of being in the Lamb of God.

Before my operation last year, Andrew warned me that I would not longer be able to sing. This was only a small worry at the time as there was also a risk I would lose my voice completely if the cancer had spread to my vocal chords. Even months after the surgery I still could not sing. I had a normal speaking voice but when I would try to sing I would croak or squeak. This was quite funny for the most parts! I am pretty stubborn and I love to sing and so in Sacrament meetings at church Mum would be shocked to hear strange noises (all coming from my feeble attempts to join in a Hymn!)

I remember sitting at the wedding of Rebecca Wild and Dan Dudley. I was so happy they were getting married but as I struggled to sing I got upset. It was frustrating to me to no longer be able to do something I loved. 

Of course I realised that I had been blessed in many ways. My health was great and I had every other faculty. I sometimes would pray silently that one day I might sing again. I promised that if I could regain my voice I would use it more.

Second practice in Birmingham

 Well, soon my voice began to return. And soon after that they announced the Lamb of God auditions. I wasn't so sure anymore I wanted to use my voice in public! But I had promised and so I took the challenge. Auditioning was one of the hardest things I have done! I was so nervous! But Megan and Ally were so kind and put me at ease. And I made it!

"His Eye is on the Sparrow" I love this song and sang it often on my mission

The rehearsals have been amazing although tiring. We rehearse once in each month on a Saturday and from 10.30am-5.30pm. It is a long day! But...so worth it! Today was one of our last rehearsals. It was my first with the Orchestra present. It was one of the best moments of my life. Being in the middle of a group creating such beauty! As the Orchestra played one of the finale pieces I felt encircled by the music. The tones from the brass instruments were so warm they surrounded me and I closed my eyes for a moment to just feel the power of emotion that Rob Gardner and our choir can produce! I am so proud to be a part of this! Watch this space for the performance!

Mothers Day

With another mothers day upon us I have been reflecting on Love and what is really is. In this world today of Fifty Shades of Grey and Twilight, Love has been entangled and tainted with ideas of lust, jealousy, and mostly Sex. Nicholas Sparks would have love and sex be the same thing while the simultaneously the world would consider both as having a one night lifetime. How sick I get of living in this mist sometimes. 

"Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove. Oh no! It is an ever fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken."

President Gordon B Hinckley likened love the the North star: constant and true. And so it is. I delight in the family I have been blessed with which shows to me True love. My Father and Mother. Little did I think on it, until I was away from home for nineteen months. Once in twenty three years had I seen my parents fight. I had no reason to believe they ever fought when not in our presence. Often did I see the attentions of Dad to Mum and been confident in his deep love for her. Always had they confided and relied whole heartedly on one another. We never had a busy or social home. Home was always a quiet refuge just for the Family. Mum and Dad only needed each other. They were different in some ways but similar in the most important. And tied together always with deep love and affection. 

Ashleigh, Me, Nana Edna, Mum (Three Generations!)

And then there is Nana and Grandad Mills. Together for over 50 years they were going strong until the end. Nana had nursed Grandad through life for much of their time together with his rare illness. She nursed her children and we her grandchildren too. As it came to the end and Nana could no longer get out of bed she would be upset at not being able to help the people she thought needed her. Grand too, loving always. He made everyone feel welcome and constantly sought to serve. He would dance me around his living room and put my name into all his old songs. He would sit for hours watching our old movies with me and not even complain when I would prefer a musical over his war films. How they loved each other! How they loved us!

So where did this love come from? It comes from Heavenly Father. They built their foundations on a love of God and put others before themselves. So the love..."the fancy or feeling" built and became deep and abiding just as the Love of Christ. It is this love I seek. I will settle for no less. Because - I already have it!

Mum and I at the Preston Temple